Demo

by No Promises

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02:53
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02:44

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released April 21, 2015

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No Promises San Diego, California

Yum Yum: guitars, vocals
Cryin' Ryan Bradford: drums

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Track Name: Politics
don't want to think about politics
no, not on the weekend
tonight i only wanna have some sex
with a girl who likes politics

no, i don't want to talk about politics
can't you see that i'm a young man
yeah maybe when i'm, like, twenty-six
i'll give a hoot about politics
i'll give a hoot about politics

don't want to read about politics
'cause it all sounds the same, friend
i'll leave it to all you toms, harrys, and dicks
y'all got time for that politics

no, i don't want to learn about politics
you know there ain't no coming back, ma'am
me and Saint Augie wanna get our kicks
before we mess around with politics
before we get around to politics
before we mess around

yeah, i'm only one small guy in the ocean of the world
i'm being tossed upon the waves as i search for my girl
i try to surf the net, but whether day or night
i got election headlines tryin'a give me a fright

i'm only one tiny dude in the cavern of the nation
i'm thinking: brewskis, babies, and summer vacation
but when i spelunk around, for a cranny of my own
i got congressional contention blowin' up my phone

i'm only one small guy in the ocean of the world
i'm being tossed upon the waves as i search for my girl
i try to surf the net, but whether day or night
i got enviro-cataclysm tryin'a give me a fright

i'm only one tiny dude in the cavern of the nation
i'm thinking: brewskis and babies; i'm thinking summer vacation
but when i spelunk around, for a cranny of my own
i got, like, signature campaigns blowin' up my phone
i got humanitarian crises blowin' up my phone
we're on the brink of global war and i am all alone

so don't gimme that politics
not right now
maybe when i'm like a hundred six
i'll have time for that politics

no i don't want to learn about politics
you know there ain't no coming back man
me and Saint Augie wanna get our kicks
before we mess around with politics
before we get around to politics
no no no
Track Name: (She Want A) Kevin
she want a Kevin
she want a Kevin
she want a Kevin
and only a Kevin will do
ooh

this one goes out to a girl i used to know
a woman, really
though i was just a boy
and she was like:

though Alans have appealing lips
my soul they'll never truly know
those Brians come a dime a dozen
worth every irritating cent
the Deons bear no ill intent
but call to mind some prurient cousin
Wednesday's children, full of woe
on my dark rocks wreck Ians' ships

oh, Lorens used to make me thrill
and to this day i bear the scars
god help you if you choose a Christian
he'll have you shortly by the strings
unsatisfied with the simpler things
white hot ambition drives a Darren
as meanwhile Brendans lust for cars
they never grew up, never will

she want a Kevin
she want a Kevin
she want a Kevin
and only a Kevin will do
ooh

the Justins have no skill for love
and i'm loath to bruise another heart
the Dustins speak so quietly
i strain to hear them in the place
trapped in an Evan's hot embrace
i cannot breathe until i'm free
poor Reubens, we've just grown apart
no longer who i'm thinking of

Valdens: sharp as little tacks
but proud and arrogant and cruel
Marlons mix their metaphors
it makes me want to run and scream
Dylans' eyes recall a dream
but nothing lies beyond the doors
while Ryans simply leave me cool
and i'm sorry for that Ryan, i truly am, i didn't ask to be this way, but i

only want a Kevin
i want a Kevin
i want a Kevin
oh my Kevin, where are you?
she want a Kevin
she want a Kevin
she want a Kevin
and only a Kevin will do
unh
Track Name: Imaginary Catherine Keener
it's been a long Saturday night out on the town
you wanna cruise back home and just lay your head down
but there is something you should never forget to do
and there's a captivating woman who's reminding you
oh yeah you're living alone, you split up with your girl
you're getting lazy in your bachelor world
but if you ever want to love again
you'd better listen to this my friend

there's an imaginary Catherine Keener
in your head helping you to remember
to always brush twice daily and floss every twenty-four hours
so if you're feeling all alone in the night
you've got to try to do at least this right
imagine Catherine with you, giving you the strength to fight
for oral hygiene, yeah

she's got a big, bright smile and a regal way
you gonna listen to whatever she say
she gonna separate the men from the boys
she gonna clue you in to one of life's joys
your little room's got only half a bath
but in your make believe you're brushin' with Cath
her counter tile is a dusty pink
you're there together at the double sink

she's an imaginary Catherine Keener
no less real in this moment beside you
than all your self-destructive fears and that harrowing loneliness
so when you're feeling like it's all you can stand
just close your eyes at the mirror and take her hand
and then in tiny circles scrub those ivories unto the promised land
of oral hygiene, yeah
Track Name: Grandma's Dinner
Grandma's dinner at the house on 194th
heat whatever's in the pantry or freezer
days bring one of my deadbeat cousins coming 'round
with bags from the Family Dollar
Grandma orders Italian delivery
talks to Marco for like ten every other day
same lasagna, same foil tray, same white Taurus
idling in the drive

she falls asleep with the TV on
dishes undone
voices low; the dogs yap and ambulate
tiny pool outside every window
dust storm
sundown

Grandma's dinner and the Furr's and the parking lot
pulverized, chalk-like, air gauzy, white-hot
redevastation on the surface of an asphalt moon
we debark in slo-mo
Grandma's bible, with the family tree
generations of strange, familiar blood line the buffet
we visit maybe every three or four years, i don't know
and it hovers in the room

Grandma's dinner is three shades of white
is this my life?
every small defeat, every incremental further retreat
each night alone?
have i come home?
Track Name: Waterslide
at the waterslide park, people come and go via waterslide
and at the waterslide park, people stand in line just to take a ride
down a long, wet plastic tube
riding a shorter wet plastic tube
oh yeah, through the wet dark
at the waterslide park

and at the waterslide park all the babies floatin' down the river
but when the sun's in the clouds all the honeys in the line start to shiver
and though you may have met her just this weekend
my friend your warm embrace is what she's seekin', oh
c'mon it's just a lark
you're at the waterslide park

c'mon Kevin
you're at the waterslide park

and at the waterslide park all they got is chili dogs and pizza
but when you're swimmin' all day all you want is chili dogs and pizza
and even if a slice of pep is six fifty
in that moment it's the best darn slice in the city
so chow down, land shark
at the waterslide park

and at the waterslide park, everybody's gettin' nonjudgmental
you know that fun is the goal and your body shape is incidental
so all you chubby, self-hatin' eighth-graders
just look around and see that most of your neighbors
are an even easier mark
nobody's hatin' at the waterslide park

ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
at the waterslide park

so take a Thursday off in September
and make this summer something to remember
so pack the loved ones into the Honda
and set the stereo to "Help Me, Rhonda"
get on the interstate at break of day
and brook no argument or delay
until you disembark
at the waterslide park